i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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