i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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