Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
