I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
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