ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
