SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
