Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
