i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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