I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
