Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
