i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
