i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I'm really into asian looking animals
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
