I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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