: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
