Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
I currently don't understand fingers.
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