She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
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