forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
