Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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