that's an acceptable place to lick
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
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