Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Your cock deserves a montage
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Randomize
