im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
