I wannas sexs uuuuu
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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