I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
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