what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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