Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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