spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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