Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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