ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Randomize
