I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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