She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
we're making bets on your personal life
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
