I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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