Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I think I am morally bankrupt
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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