We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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