Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
