so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
