i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
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So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
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You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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