Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
