I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
