she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
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