$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
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