So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Randomize
