she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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