What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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