Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I understand Curling. That high.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
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