my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
