the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
it wasn't lemon gatorade
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
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