I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Randomize
