I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
