Dual....:-)
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
