I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Randomize
