he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Randomize
