I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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